While the water cooler debates over
"King James" will
rage on, Mark Jackson's time as an ABC/ESPN Commentator, and also sadly
the Mark Jackson drinking game, has come to an end. It seems like yesterday that Jackson took over as lead analyst, but in reality it was almost 5 years ago. An amazing run particularly, as
CA Clark so perfectly stated, for one who's
"stylings are like a cross between Hubie Brown and Scotty Brooks, except if you were to remove any indication whatsoever that the speaker has ever even seen the game of basketball." While I'm certain Jackson's postgame press conferences and half-time speeches will be a treasure trove for generations to come, this is truly an end of an era.
Who does ABC/ESPN have on tap for a Jackson replacement? That is yet to be determined, but that has not stopped me from coming up with some tremendous candidates...
The Former NBA Player Pick (& logical choice):
Shaq. Charles Barkley
has already stated “Somebody’s gonna be fired" to make room for him. Could that make Van Gundy the odd man out and a future assistant coach in Golden State?
The B-List Celebrity Pick:
Craig Kilborn. Obviously it would be impressive if ABC/ESPN pulled something major like Jack Nicholson, Spike Lee or even better Will Ferrell. But, that is not too likely, it really would probably have to be a B-Lister desperate for attention after numerous failures, ala
Dennis Miller and Monday Night Football. Kilborn fits that to a T. Even more interesting, the career paths between Miller and Kilborn are almost identical, minus the time at Sportscenter, and like Miller he's a complete douche. ABC already has him
signed to a deal so the stars a aligned!
The Wildcard Pick:
Flula Borg, the Bavarian-born German DJ.
Sadly it will probably be
Reggie Miller,
Jon Barry or
Bill Simmons (I'm still voting for Flula). Even sadder, the bar I watched Game 6 in quickly changed the channel from the post-game show to
Van Halen's Panama, thus I missed out on Jackson's final sign off, but one can only hope it was endearing as some of his trademark lines.
"Hands down, Man Down"
"Excuse me, I have a meeting with the rim!"
"You're better than that!"
"That's a grown man move right there."
"Come get in my poster!"
"...if you come out and compete anything can happen."
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